sassykardashian:

IF YOU EVER GET IN A FIGHT WITH YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER JUST BREATHE IN THE HELIUM OUT OF A BALLOON AND HAVE AN ARGUMENT AND THE FIRST ONE TO LAUGH LOSES

(via bastille)

meladoodle:

godlykesha:

meladoodle:

one time my dad tripped over some ice and was like ‘this is JUST like the titanic’

is this the same dad that once called you dad

no, that was a different dad. i have thousands of dads that ive synthesised in my home lab in the basement. speaking of that, the three armed one just got out again god damnit

(Source: meladoodle, via laughcentre)

giraffepoliceforce:

If people are really going to assume that guys with long hair are gay and girls with short hair are lesbians then I am going to assume that all bald men are actually eagles.

(via rxvenous)

unheat:

Sometimes I think you love me. Sometimes I think you like me. Other times, I think I’m nobody to you. Yeah, this sucks.

(Source: sedusable, via asian)

exhistur:

I wonder if anyone ever looks at me while I’m doing something and thinks I’m pretty. Because I do that all the time to people. 

(via laughcentre)

urbancatfitters:

i’ve dated at least *counts on fingers* zero people

(Source: urbancatfitters, via laughcentre)

gnawruto:

foodtrucker:

I manage to turn everything into crap wow

yes that’s called digestion

(Source: foodtrucker, via gnarly)

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